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How Do I Get Rid Of The Rage I Feel?

Written By: Sandra James

Audio Version Below

It’s Sunday morning worship at my church. I am in a bad mood not sure why. Haven’t been able to shake it since I got up this morning.

As the sounds of joy filled voices and praise fill the sanctuary, I can feel the deep wrinkle that has formed in my fore head, shoulders stiff head tilted slightly upward.

And all of a sudden the lady next to me taps me on the shoulder, if looks could kill she will be dead. “Why are you touching me, I glared at her?” What could be so important that you are disturbing me? Ooooh God, lady what do you want?

“May I borrow a pen” she whispered quietly. Without answering her, I turned around and picked up my over sized Louis Vuitton from the floor.

Digging in my bag with noticeable irritation, I grab my Lamy 2000 pen, no I thought she may not give my pen back.

I reached in deeper for a cheaper pen from the bottom of my purse. Okay she can use this one I thought it was only $.99. Dusting the crumbs from the Bic pen, I gave it to her. “Thank you” she said, “you can just keep it” I told her” with a smile. I didn’t mean to give her that ugly look, it just came out.

Lord, Why can’t I be sweeter like some of the other sisters in the church? Why was I scared she wasn’t going to return my expensive pen? I thought

As the woman finish writing notes in her notepad, I glanced over at her she was smiling…hmmm okay I thought, she ignored my nasty attitude and has gone on about her business. I need a sprinkle of that. Wow her lipstick matches her skin perfectly.

After service, I gave her the official church hug and puppy pat on the back. As I was pulling away and getting ready to make a b-line towards the door so I can get in my car and speed home she says ” you are sooo beautiful, I was blessed by your singing today”

Embarrassed by my behavior I murmured Really? thank you, I didn’t think I did so well I chuckled No! You were wonderful she said with excitement.

Driving home I scolded myself for being so unloving.

Why do you do that! Where is this anger coming from? That’s why you don’t have any friends! What is your problem!


Written By: Sandra James


Listen to the Audio Version Here